|
|
|
| ||||
[Nikki and Jude are sitting by the Big Squeeze. Wyatt and Jen walk up.]
Wyatt: "Hey. You guys hear they're shooting a movie in the mall?"
Jude: "Cool."
Jen: "Yeah, they're shooting at the Penalty Box and holding auditions for extras at Grind Me!" [Caitlin walks by, covering her lips.] "Hey Caitlin, you hear the news?" [Caitlin doesn't respond.] "Caitlin?"
[Caitlin heaves the Big Squeeze open and starts to get out her equipment without moving her lip hand.]
Nikki: "Caitlin, what's up?"
Caitlin: "Oh, I just feel a yawn coming on, and I want to be ready."
Jen: "Caitlin, move your hand."
[Caitlin moves her hand, revealing a cold sore on her lower lip.]
Caitlin: "I have a lip thingy!" [She begins to cry.]
Wyatt: "It's just a cold sore."
Caitlin: "It's a lip thingy!"
Jude: [looking closely] "Could be a lip zit. I once had a zit on my back that had a life of its own. One morning it was gone, and so was a pair of my shoes."
Caitlin: "It's not a cold sore. And it's not a lip zit! It's a lip thingy!"
Nikki: "Don't you get those from kissing?"
Caitlin: "I got it from a boy, okay? But I'm not saying who. Ugh! I've had it with guys. I'm done with them. I really thought he was The One." [She begins crying again.]
Wyatt: "He was The One. The One who gave you a cold sore."
Caitlin: "Lip thingy!!!"
The title of this episode is
The One With the Cold Sore
[Caitlin is serving a nerdy customer.]
Jude: "I don't know for sure that the zit took my shoes, but it's pretty weird, dudes."
Jonesy: [walking up] "Hey Caitlin, you got a lip thingy."
Caitlin: "See? Lip thingy. Thank you, Jonesy."
Jonesy: "Yeah. Right. So anyway, big news!"
Nikki: "Yeah, they're shooting a movie."
Jen: "And they're auditioning at Grind Me."
Nikki: "Are you gonna audition?"
Jonesy: "Of course! I was born for this! I'm going to be a star! Anyone else want to try out?"
Caitlin: "I'd love to! But I'm gonna need some industrial strength cover-up first."
[Jen, Wyatt, and Jude get up.]
Jen: "I need a coffee."
Wyatt: "I need java."
Jude: "I'm craving Nice Cinnabuns."
Nikki: [standing up] "Let's go."
Jonesy: "If you're coming for moral support, I don't need it."
Nikki: "I'm coming to watch you make a fool of yourself."
Jonesy: "That's not very supportive."
[There is a line stretching out the door of the coffeehouse barricaded by a red velvet rope.]
Darth: [halting the friends] "Ron and I are movie set security. If you're here to audition, move to the back of the line."
[Jonesy and Caitlin sigh and head to the back of the line. Jen, Wyatt, and Nikki go on ahead.]
Ron Hughes: [on the phone] "Lindsay what? Checked into a hospital for exhaustion? SHE'LL NEVER WORK IN THIS TOWN AGAIN!" [more calmly] "Tell her to call me, I have the perfect part for her in an upcoming project." [to his assistant] "We need to fill the Natalie role." [to Kirsten] "Any acting experience?"
Kirsten: "I played Goldilocks in the fourth grade!" [acting poorly] "This porridge is too hot."
Kristen: "Omigosh! That was so good! I could like, smell the porridge!"
Kirsten: "Don't. That's way too many calories."
Kristen: "Can you smell calories, or do you have to eat them?"
Kirsten: "Don't be silly. Anything you can smell you can eat."
Kristen: "Oh no! Am I fatter?"
Ron Hughes: "Non-speaking parts only. Next!"
[At the counter, Jen, Wyatt, and Nikki have received their drinks. Jen takes a sip.]
Jen: "Owga! Hop coppy! Burned my lips!" [Her lips swell up.]
Wyatt: "Burned her lips. Rookie mistake." [He blows on his coffee and then takes a sip.]
Jen: "I'm late. See you guys later!"
[Jen walks forward and trips over a wire just as behind her, the director's assistant puts a fan down and turns it on. When Jen looks back at the fan, her cheeks are rosy, her lips are large, and her hair is blowing in the wind.]
Ron Hughes: "Full lips, rosy cheeks, flowing hair like a young Jessica Alba! Can we get Jessica Alba, no, okay. You're going to be a huge star!"
Jen: "Be? A huche star?"
Ron Hughes: "Ooh, trouble with the English language, but that is so hot in Hollywood these days!" [quietly] "We've got our Lindsay replacement." [shaking hands with Jen] "Ron Hughes, director! You've just landed yourself a supporting role!"
Jen: "Okay!"
Caitlin: [rushing up] "Wait! What about me?"
Ron Hughes: "Cute. Shame about the cold sore."
Caitlin: [walking away disappointed] "Lip thingy."
Jonesy: "Dude, glad you dig my stepsister, but you're going to love me."
Ron Hughes: "No thanks. Next!"
Jonesy: "But–"
Ron Hughes: "NEXT!"
[Ron and Darth leap in to drag Jonesy away.]
Wyatt: "Hey Jonesy. Do you want–"
Ron Hughes: "You've got a part!"
Jonesy: "What?"
Wyatt: "Me? Really?" [Nikki walks up.]
Ron Hughes: "You're in too."
Jonesy: "Oh come on!"
Nikki: "I would say no, but..."
Darth: [to Jonesy] "So long, Solo." [He and Ron escort Jonesy out.]
Nikki: "...this is way too much fun."
Jonesy: "Let go of me you little–ow!"
[Those who got into the movie are looking over the script.]
Nikki: "Wow. You got nine lines."
Caitlin: "You're gonna be a star, Jen!"
Jonesy: "Nine lines won't make you a star."
[Kristen and Kirsten run up giggling.]
Kristen: "Hi Jen. Congrats on being...famous."
Kirsten: "Yeah, totally. Like, hi. We just wanted to say that. Hi."
Jen: "Hi?"
Kristen and Kirsten: "She said hi to us! EEEE!" [They walk away.]
Wyatt: [to Jonesy] "You were saying?"
Jen: "That hot coffee burned my throat. I need to get some lozenges."
Caitlin: "You can't run your own errands, Jen! You're an actress! You should get an assistant! Jonesy can do it." [Jonesy glowers at her.] "You'd get to be on set." [Jonesy continues glowering.] "It's the perfect way to get noticed!"
Jonesy: "Hey, yeah! What do you say, Jen?"
Jen: "Uh, okay. But screw up, Jonesy, and you're fired!"
Jonesy: "Story of my life."
Jen: "So can you get me some lozenges and meet me on set?"
Jonesy: "You know it."
Jen: [happy] "I've got a wardrobe fitting! EEE!" [She walks off, Jonesy in tow.]
Wyatt: [walking off] "We should check in with the extras."
Nikki: [to Caitlin] "See you later."
Caitlin: [unhappy] "Yeah, bye."
[Caitlin is alone at work. Jude skates up to the Big Squeeze.]
Jude: "Still bummed about your lip zit?" [Caitlin nods.] "As someone once said, don't let a zit get you down, bra."
Caitlin: "Who said that?"
Jude: "Well I did. Just now."
Caitlin: "Maybe I need some retail therapy." [She closes the Big Squeeze.]
Jude: "I'm gonna cheer you up, Jude style!" [He leads Caitlin away.]
[Jonesy walks into the Penalty Box with the lozenges and cheers up the instant he sees the movie set. He goes over to Jen and shakes the lozenges.]
Jen: "Oh, thanks, Jonesy. I'm going into wardrobe, so uh, take a break."
Jonesy: "Gee, thanks."
Wyatt: [looking across the corridor] "Hey, there's Caitlin." [Caitlin is holding the hand of someone obscured by a display.] "She's–with someone." [Caitlin grins at the guy she's with.]
Nikki: "I thought she swore off guys. Well that lasted a whole half hour."
[The three friends quit paying attention just as Jude yanks Caitlin away.]
Caitlin: "Jude! Huntington's is having a sale! Where are we going?"
Jude: "You'll see, bra."
[When Jen comes out of wardrobe, everyone gasps. She looks like a movie queen.]
Ron: "Gah!"
Coach Halder: "Masterson! You look like a badminton player crammed into a peewee uniform! Drop and give me twenty!"
Jen: "But Coach!" [She sighs and bends over, exposing herself for a panty shot.]
Coach Halder: "Ggh–erm–bad idea. Let's find the rest of your uniform." [He holds out a hockey jersey.]
Ron Hughes: [leading Jen away] "Tell your bodyguard to clear set. Alright, let's get ready to roll!"
Coach Halder: "Bodyguard? Oh-ah-em-erm, alright, I can do that. Hey you! Nondescript male! Eyes down! Five-minute foul for major misconduct!" [The guy he's barking at walks over to the penalty box.]
[Jude's hands are over Caitlin's eyes.]
Jude: "We're at my favorite store, dudette!"
[Caitlin giggles. Jude removes his hands, and she gasps.]
Caitlin: "The Cheapo Bin? Jude, the dollar store has nothing for someone like me."
[Jude gently guides Caitlin inside. A short time later, she has found a lot of stuff she likes.]
Caitlin: "Look at all the stuff I got for six bucks! A porcelain rooster, an ice cube tray, whatever this thing is, a DVD of a show I've never even heard of? Who knew spending so little money on stuff you don't need could be so fun! What'd you get?"
Jude: "A ghost costume and a rubber band." [He draws back the rubber band and shoots it.]
Stuart Goldstein: [hit] "What the?!?"
Caitlin: "But it's not Halloween."
Jude: "They have them here all year except Halloween! You ready for more Jude therapy?"
Caitlin: "Soon as I drop off my bags!"
[Jen is having her makeup reapplied.]
Jen: "Jonesy, could you get me a lemon whip?"
Jonesy: "Fine, whatever."
Wyatt: [looking outside] "There's Caitlin again." [Caitlin is walking with a guy in a ghost costume.]
Jen: "Who's the ghost?"
Nikki: "Caitlin's new man."
Jen: "I thought she swore off guys."
Caitlin: [noticing her friends] "Hi guys!" [She and the ghost wave.]
Wyatt: [waving back] "Whomever he is, Caitlin seems a lot happier than she was this morning."
[Jonesy is waiting by the Big Squeeze when Caitlin comes in to drop off her bags. Jude is with her, costume under his arm.]
Jonesy: "Superstar wants a lemon whip. And one for me while you're at it."
Caitlin: [making the drinks] "So how's it going over there?"
Jonesy: "Being an assistant stinks! And that director has no eye for talent." [He takes the drinks.] "Thanks."
Caitlin: "Seeya!"
Jonesy: "Later."
Caitlin: "Where to next, Jude?"
[Jen is talking with an actor.]
Phoenix: "Move to L.A. Mountains, sunshine, plastic surgery for pets..."
Jen: "Sounds amazing. I'd love to." [Jonesy hands her a drink.] "Oh, Phoenix, this is my assistant, Jonesy." [She takes a sip.] "Hwaah! This is way too bitter!"
Jonesy: "Don't look at me! Caitlin made it."
Phoenix: "Whoa! Don't let your assistant talk to you like that."
Jonesy: "Actually, I'm her step–"
Jen: [interrupting] "My uh, stepping stone to a better assistant who doesn't talk so much!" [handing over her drink] "I want it sweeter, and uh, get it right this time!"
Phoenix: "Good help is so hard to find."
Jen: "Tell me about it."
[Caitlin and Jude are on the Vomit Comet, waiting for it to start.]
Caitlin: "I don't know, Jude. This thing makes me puke."
Jude: "Today is about running through hurdles, bra!"
Caitlin: "I thought you were supposed to jump over hurdles."
Jude: "Over, through, under, whatever it takes to get past them! Fear is nothing to be afraid of unless you let it scare you, dudette!"
[The rollercoaster starts. Caitlin's phone rings, and she answers.]
Caitlin: [panting] "Nikki?"
Nikki: "Hey. Whatcha doin'?"
Caitlin: [panting] "I can't hear you!"
Nikki: [louder] "So how's the no-boys thing going?"
[Caitlin sees the drop up ahead and gasps.]
Caitlin: [to Jude] "I'm so nervous. I don't want to go too fast. Eenh. Eeeennh. AAAH!"
Nikki: "Caitlin? You there?" [The rollercoaster is doing loops and twirls.]
Caitlin: "EEEENH! AAAAHH!"
Wyatt: "Is she still crying about her cold sore?"
Caitlin: "WEEENH! EEEEEE!" [panting] "AAAAAAHHH! WOO! AAAAH! OOOOH! AAAAH!"
Nikki: "Uh, I don't think Caitlin's crying."
Caitlin: "UNH! OOH!" [She laughs.] "WOOHOO! YEAH! WHEE!" [The coaster slows to a stop at the start of the ride.] "Oops." [exhilarated] "Oh my gosh, that was amazing! Let's do it again!"
Wyatt: "What was that?"
[Wyatt and Nikki stare straight ahead, shocked.]
Ron Hughes: "Okay, people! In this scene, you've just learned that spring break has been cancelled! So look shocked!" [noticing Wyatt and Nikki] "Oh! Love it! Everyone copy these two. And...action!"
[Jonesy walks up to the stand with the drink. The stand is open, but Caitlin is nowhere around.]
Jonesy: "Caitlin? Great. Now I have to make their drinks myself." [He enters the stand and starts working. Three pre-teen girls arrive at the store.]
Pre-Teen Girl #1: "Three lemon whips, please."
Jonesy: "Hey! I don't work here! I'm just trying to fix a drink for Jen Masterson, superstar! Because this one was too bitter!"
Pre-Teen Girl #1: [shocked] "Jen Masterson drank from that cup? I'll give you ten bucks for it!"
Jonesy: "You can't be serious."
Pre-Teen Girl #1: "Fifteen! Twenty's all I got!"
Jonesy: "Sold!" [The girls take the cup and squeal.] "Spread the word! I've got tons of Jen Masterson stuff!" [to himself] "When opportunity knocks, make sweet sweet lemonade."
Ron Hughes: "And...cut! That's a wrap for the day, people! Helen, can you give me a B-shot before I-plots?"
Nikki: [to Wyatt] "So, it sounds like Caitlin's falling fast for this new guy."
Jen: [to Phoenix] "I definitely think my next project will be more of an indie. Those are the films that win all the awards."
Phoenix: "That's what I keep telling my agent!"
Jen: "Ugh, agents! Don't get me started!" [They walk away.]
Wyatt: "Wow. Jen's really getting into this acting thing."
[A bunch of screaming fans are outside the Penalty Box, held back by Darth.]
Jen: [taken aback] "Um, hi."
Coach Halder: "You, out of the way! You, out of the way!" [turning to his stars] "Okay, Toby Crashed! Follow me into the end zone, Masterson!" [bulldozing through the crowd] "Out of the way! Out of the way! Out of the way!"
Wyatt: "Whoa. I guess Jen really is a star."
Nikki: "All the world's a stage, and we're just extras."
[Jude and Caitlin come back to the Big Squeeze. Caitlin is snacking on a snow cone.]
Caitlin: "Why do they call–" [taking a nip] "–the blue one raspberry? It should be blueberry."
[Caitlin takes another nip, and Jude takes a nip as well.]
Jude: "Definitely raspberry. Gotta pee, be right back." [He walks away.]
Nikki: [spying on Caitlin with Wyatt] "Look at her! Messy hair, smeared makeup? She's been making out."
Wyatt: [seeing someone approach] "Is this our mystery man?"
Nikki: "No, just Jude."
Caitlin: "Thanks so much for today, Jude. I'm having the best time." [She plants a kiss on his cheek.]
Jude: "Me too, dudette. Plenty more where that came from. Let's bounce!"
[Jude and Caitlin walk away while Wyatt and Nikki just stare, shocked.]
Nikki: "Could Caitlin's new guy be–"
Nikki and Wyatt: "Jude?"
[Jonesy is inside the Big Squeeze, mixing up a drink.]
Wyatt: "Hey. Have you been here all night?"
Jonesy: "Since six A.M.! And that's after Jen made me do her laundry last night so she could 'part-ay' with Phoenix and the other 'act-tours.'" [He exits the stand carrying a garbage bag.]
Wyatt: "What's in the bag?"
Jonesy: "Jen's stuff. Clothes, toothbrush, a few baby pictures. You won't believe what people are willing to pay for this stuff now that she's famous. Gotta go. Her majesty awaits." [He leaves.]
Nikki: "You know, if Caitlin and Jude were dating, they'd tell us."
Wyatt: "You're right. It was just a kiss on the cheek." [Caitlin and Jude walk up.]
Caitlin: "Hi guys."
Jude: "Hey dudes."
[Jude sets his ghost costume on the table, and Nikki and Wyatt gasp. Jude has a cold sore.]
Nikki: [freaked out] "Hey Jude, is that a cold sore?"
Jude: "A lip zit. I ate too much junk food at the amusement park yesterday."
Wyatt: [to Caitlin] "You seem happier today."
Caitlin: "Yeah, I guess I am."
Nikki: "Could it have something to do with a certain...guy?"
Jonesy: "Has anyone seen one of Jen's pink socks?"
Wyatt: "No. Why?"
Jonesy: "I've got a buyer for the pair, but I can only find one in the bag. I must have dropped it." [He rushes off to find it.]
Nikki: "So Caitlin–" [She stops. Caitlin and Jude have disappeared.] "–and she's gone."
[Jen is guarded by Coach Halder and Jonesy while inside the Penalty Box. She hands Jonesy a clipboard.]
Jen: "Here's a schedule and a list of things to do. I don't pay you to stand around, Jonesy!"
Jonesy: "You don't pay me at all! In fact–" [He stops when he sees the director walking by.] "I am a professional who aspires to exceed my employer's expectations. I'll memorize this list and be ready when you call me to action."
[Ron drives up in his cart, and Coach Halder and Jen get in. He drives off.]
Kristen: [as the cart goes by] "Jen I love you! Jen I love you!"
Jonesy: [as soon as Jen's gone] "Any of you girls interested in buying an official pair of Jen Masterson socks?"
[The girls swarm Jonesy.]
[Wyatt and Nikki are walking through the mall.]
Wyatt: "Ah, If Jude and Caitlin are dating, it's gonna change things! First you and Jonesy, now Caitlin and Jude–aw, that leaves me and Jen!" [Ron drives by with Jen.]
Nikki: "Can you see them together? I mean, Caitlin shops for sport! And–"
Wyatt: "Jude throws wet toilet paper at the ceiling in the loathsome washrooms!"
Nikki: "See? That is so not Caitlin."
[In the washrooms, Jude is teaching Caitlin the art of the wet toilet paper toss.]
Jude: "You're up. Focus...stay on target." [She tosses it up, and it sticks.] "Sweet! Our work here is done."
Caitlin: [giggling] "So where to next?"
[Jude and Caitlin have made a smiley face on the ceiling.]
[The where to next is the pet store.]
Caitlin: [petting a bunny] "I never knew you played with animals, Jude. That's so nice."
Jude: "The rabbit thinks so."
[Nikki and Wyatt are inside the Penalty Box.]
Wyatt: "Even if they are dating, I'm sure they're taking it slow."
Caitlin: "Hey guys! Look at our baby bunny! Isn't he sweet?" [to the bunny] "Okay, come with Mummy and Daddy."
Nikki: "Mommy and Daddy?"
Wyatt: "We'd better tell Jen and Jonesy."
[There is a line by the fountain to get autographs from the cast.]
Little Girl: [holding out one of Jen's baby pictures] "Would you sign this for me?"
Jen: [shocked] "Where did you get this?!?"
Jonesy: "Uh-oh." [He bolts. Jen's phone rings.]
Jen: "Hello?"
Nikki: "Jen?"
Jen: "Nikki?"
Nikki: "We've gotta talk. We think Jude and Caitlin are dating."
Jen: "What? Come to the fountain, I'm sighing autographs." [She hangs up.]
Wyatt: "Signing autographs?"
Nikki: "Well, la-di-dah."
[Wyatt and Nikki come to the back of the long line for autographs. When they see how long it is, they cut to the front.]
Darth: [stopping them] "Back of the line, stargazers."
Wyatt: "We're not fans, we're friends!"
[Darth points to the back of the line, and the two head there. A while later, they're finally at the front, only for the autograph session to be over and Ron to have driven off with Jen.]
Darth: "Time's up. Autograph session's over."
Nikki: "Oh, where's she going now?" [She calls Jen.]
Jonesy: [answering] "Jen Masterson's phone." [He has people thrusting money at him.]
Nikki: "Jonesy? Why do you have Jen's phone?"
Jonesy: "'Cause some actor told Jen that cell phones cause brain tumors, and Jen said better me than her." [to a fan] "30 bucks for the yearbook, there's good stuff in there."
Nikki: "We think Jude and Caitlin are dating."
Jonesy: "No way! Twenty for the pillowcase, drool and all."
Nikki: "We gotta talk. Where'd she go?"
Jonesy: "Khaki Barn. Meet you there in five."
[Jen is using the changing rooms at the Khaki Barn.]
Kirsten: "Come out, and we'll tell you how super-hot you look, no matter what."
Jen: "I love having this store to myself. Being a celebrity shopper rocks!" [Nikki and Wyatt walk up.]
Kirsten: "Uh, the store's closed, Nikki. We have a celebrity shopper?"
Nikki: "Uh, I work here, Kirsten, and that celebrity shopper is my best friend."
Jen: "Nikki?"
Wyatt: "Jen! We think Jude and Caitlin are dating!"
Jen: "What?!?" [She throws the door open, not remembering she's in her underwear.]
The Clones: "Whoa."
Jonesy: "Seen it."
Coach Halder: "AAH! Female undergarments! Oh my god!"
Jen: [shutting the door] "Oops. Sorry. Are you sure?"
Wyatt: "Jude's got a cold sore! We saw them kiss!"
Nikki: [at the same time as Wyatt] "They've got a rabbit! Jude's the one in the ghost costume!"
Jen: [exiting the changing room] "Okay, okay. What do we do?"
Jonesy: "Um, nothing? It isn't really up to us."
Nikki: "I can't believe that I'm saying this, but I think Jonesy's right."
Jen: "Do they know that we know?"
Nikki: "Uh-uh."
Jen: "Then we'd better tell them."
[Jude and Caitlin are sampling ice creams.]
Jude: "Mmm. Quite nice, ice cream girl."
Caitlin: "Hmm, I don't know. I think we should try the mint chocolate chip."
Vendor Girl: "Are you going to buy any ice cream or not?"
Jude: "Uh, no thanks."
Caitlin: "We're full." [They leave the store.]
[Phoenix and Jen are making out inside the Penalty Box.]
Ron Hughes: "And cut! That's a wrap. Break set. Love your work, people."
Jen: "Phoenix, if I move to L.A., do you th–"
Phoenix: "Great working with you, later." [He walks away.]
Jen: "That's it? Later?" [She sighs and walks away. She comes across some pre-teen girls wearing her clothes.] "Hey, that's my shirt! And my hat!"
Pre-Teen Girl #2: "They're ours, we bought them!"
Jen: "From who?" [They point at Jonesy.] "JONESY!"
Jonesy: "What you want now?"
Jen: "Alright, who bought stuff from this scammer?" [everyone's hands go up] "I want it back right now!" [A little boy walks up to her.] "Whatever it is, hand it over." [He spits out a retainer into her hand.] "Ew! My retainer?"
Jonesy: "You don't need it anymore. Your teeth look great."
Jen: "You are the lowest, dirtiest–"
Jonesy: "Oh, come on! You've been a total diva for the last two days! You've yelled at me for everything I've done wrong, and not once thanked me for a thing I've done right. Putting on a show for your Hollywood friends. You may be in a movie, but when you get home, you'll find you have no socks!"
Ron Hughes: "Wow, great monologue. Real drama. You really should have auditioned for the movie, you totally would have gotten a part."
[Jonesy slumps as the director walks away.]
[Caitlin and Jude are lying on a blanket by the fountain.]
Caitlin: "Ugh, all that ice cream made me feel sick."
Jude: "Yeah, but at least it made you sick for free." [He farts.] "Sorry. Dairy makes me gassy." [He lets out two more toots.]
Caitlin: [laughing] "Jude, stop it!" [She farts.] "Oops. Pistachio makes me gassy too."
[Caitlin and Jude have a laughing, stinky fart party.]
Nikki: "Hey." [All four friends have arrived.]
Caitlin: "Oh, I guess the movie shoot's over. Hi guys!"
Nikki: "Hey...we just want to tell you that we know what's going on here."
[Jude and Caitlin sniff the air.]
Jude: "Is it bad?"
Caitlin: "Sorry."
Wyatt: "It's not bad at all. Whatever you guys need to do is cool with us."
Jen: "Totally. Jonesy and I heard too."
Caitlin: "All the way over at the Penalty Box?"
Nikki: "It's been kinda hard to miss."
Jude: [taking a whiff] "Whoa, dudes. I must be lactose intolerant."
Wyatt: "We want you to know that we're here to listen. Whenever you're ready."
[Caitlin and Jude look at each other.]
Jude: "If you say so!" [He and Caitlin break into their fart party again.]
Jen: "Eww!"
Nikki: [sarcastic] "That went well."
[The friends are gathered around the usual table.]
Caitlin: "I can't believe you guys thought Jude and I were dating."
Jude: "For shame, dudes."
Caitlin: "I was taking a break from boys. Though I had a date last night, and I'm seeing him again today. EEEE!"
Wyatt: "I guess we had it all wrong."
Jen: "I had it all wrong too. Sorry I got so bossy." [She laughs nervously.] "Boy, is fame fickle."
Jonesy: [handing Jen some money] "Sorry about your stuff. Here. Treat yourself to some new socks."
Jock: [hustling up to the table] "Uh, Caitlin? I'm gonna have to cancel our date tonight."
[The teenager reveals he has a cold sore on his lip before running off.]
Caitlin: "Too bad. I really thought he was The One."
Wyatt: "He was The One. The One you gave a cold sore t–"
Caitlin: "Lip thingy!"
Season 3 Scripts |
Sweet 6teen • Baby, You Stink • Selling Out To The Burger Man • The Journal • Silent Butt Deadly • The New Jonesy • Wrestlemania • Prank'd • 2-4-1 • Another Day at the Office • Oops, I Dialed It Again • How the Rent-A-Cop Stole Christmas • Insert Name Here • All Pets Are Off • J is For Genius • Bicker Me Not • Love At Worst Sight • The One with the Cold Sore • Double Date • Fashion Victims • Whoa, Baby • Cheapskates • Opposites Attack • Mr. and Mr. Perfect • Date and Switch • Life Slaver |
Seasons: Season 1 • Season 2 • Season 3 • Season 4 • Hour-Long Specials |
See also: Episode Guide |