|Episode name reference to/pun on: None
|Season 4, Episode 87
||CAN: November 12, 2009|
USA: May 17, 2010
||Alex Ganetakos (supervising)
is the 87th episode of 6teen and the seventh episode of the fourth and final season. It aired on Teletoon in Canada on November 12, 2009, and on Cartoon Network in the United States on May 17, 2010.
When Wyatt is unable to get a girlfriend, Jonesy offers his friend access to his legendary list: a comprehensive database that contains information on every single girl he's ever dated. However, the confirmation of the list's existence leads several groups to vie for control of the list. While the fight for the list rages through the mall, Jude discovers that he has a lucky zit. Meanwhile, Caitlin's credit card gets stolen, so Caitlin and Jen set off on a quest to find the thief.
When Wyatt walks up to the Big Squeeze, he is unhappy because on his date the previous night, the girl he was going out with actually leapt out of the car rather than finish the date. As a result, he is immensely depressed about his chances of ever finding love, and he is completely uncheered when Jonesy tries to use his bat hat (part of Jonesy's new job's uniform) to cheer him up. Furthermore, his depression isn't just a short-time thing, as it persists throughout the day.
Jonesy can't stand to see one of his friends so down, however, so he pulls out a PDA. On the PDA is his fabled list: a record of phone numbers, likes and dislikes, assessments of various abilities–in short, a log of every girl that Jonesy has ever encountered complete with all the information necessary to get a relationship off the ground. While such a weapon would surely be a boon to Wyatt, Nikki isn't happy to learn that not only does Jonesy have such a list, but he's been carrying it around the entire time that they've been dating. When Jonesy is unable to tell how long they've been dating, she angrily storms off, but Jonesy follows her to try and make amends. However, when Nikki reads the entry on her, she is even more offended, and when Jonesy tries to weasel his way out by stating that the entry was written a long time ago, she asks him for a current assessment. When Jonesy is unable to stutter out anything beyond that Nikki is good, Nikki angrily tells him to leave her alone.
Nikki isn't the only one interested in the list, however, as when Wyatt shows up at Burger McFlipster's he is accosted by Wayne. Wayne has heard about Jonesy offering the list to Wyatt, and he wants in on the list as well. This is because Wayne believes that the list will allow lonely men like him to hit on women they would never have a chance at otherwise.
Soon, though, Nikki talks to Jen and Caitlin about her problems. While none of them have a solution, she does come to a conclusion: she and Jonesy should go on a break until he figures out what she means to him. To drive the point home, she decides to do it while looking hotter than any other girl he's ever seen, and the next day she goes shopping with her friends. They take her to Albatross & Finch, load her down with tight clothes, and let her know that Jonesy will be unable to forget her in such an outfit. While the clothing is nothing like Nikki's usual style, she's certain that it will work to get her point across, and the group heads for the checkout. There, Caitlin is ready to use her credit card, but when she reaches into her wallet she finds the card missing.
Wayne, meanwhile, has decided to go straight to the source of the list, and begins bothering Jonesy while he works. Jonesy is unwilling to hand his list over, however, so Wayne begins to threaten him. While Jonesy doesn't take these threats seriously, he does take Nikki's threat seriously, and begins to think deeply about what exactly Nikki means to him until while in line at Wonder Taco he realizes that Nikki may just be the one.
Before Jonesy can admit this to Nikki, however, she comes towards him, intending to break up with him. Before she can do it, though, Jonesy is driven to take off by the approach of an angry mob of men led by Wayne. Jonesy was prepared for this, however, and handed the PDA to Jude to hide; unfortunately, he can't tell this to the mob, so he ends up running from them. For security, Jude leaves too, heading in the other direction, while Nikki merely sits down and complains about Jonesy's list. However, Wyatt mentions that Jude planned to hide it in the air vents, so Nikki decides that if anybody's going to find the list it will be her.
Nikki's vent crawl ends fruitlessly, in large part due to the fact that Jude never actually hid the list in the vents. When Nikki exits the vents, she lands in the girls' bathroom next to Julie. Nikki begins to tell Julie her frustrations with Jonesy and his list, but Julie is privy to an important piece of information: Jonesy thinks that Nikki might just be the one. When Nikki hears about this, she is at first shocked and then amazed that Jonesy might feel this way about her.
Wayne is still busy and has enlisted the help of Darth to crack the list's code. With his army behind him, Wayne finds Jonesy and chases him all the way to an upper-floor railing over the fountain. Cornered and with no other options, Jonesy jumps over the rail. His cape allows him to land more lightly than he would have been able to otherwise, but the group of men is still looking at him and it is obvious that they will continue to pursue.
However, at that moment Jude arrives with Jonesy's PDA. Seeing no other options, Jonesy decides that it would be better to let the list perish than to let the likes of Wayne get their hands on it. So saying, he tosses the PDA in the fountain and lets it, and his list, perish, much to Wayne's despair.
Later, though, he and his two male friends meet in the washrooms with the lights turned out and only the light from a laptop as their guide. The laptop contains the backup version of Jonesy's list, and once it's downloaded onto Wyatt's PDA he plans to delete it. The download is suddenly interrupted, however, as three people walk into the bathroom: Jen, Caitlin, and Nikki. Nikki is still wearing her new clothes, and Jonesy has some important information for her. Jonesy changed the entry on Nikki to read "Nikki: she's The One." Nikki happily accepts this, and they walk out of the bathroom hand in hand, happy together once more.
Sub-Plot One: Jude's Zit
Jude is inside Grind Me, participating in a contest to guess how many coffee beans are in a jar, when he notices a zit forming on his chin. Immediately after noticing this, he makes a random guess that just happens to be exactly correct. Jude takes this as evidence that his zit is lucky, and soon appears to be proven correct when he is able to get a coin to come up heads repeatedly.
Jude's string of good luck continues, so he decides to feed his zit greasy foods to make it grow larger. When he hears about a contest at North Shore Surf & Skate to win a longboard autographed by Christian Lotenza, his desire to make his zit larger only amplifies, and he starts eating such fare as chocolate-covered pizza. However, when Wyatt warns Jude that if the zit gets too big it could pop, Jude reconsiders his tactics and decides to instead guard his zit against being popped at all costs.
To help with this, Jude gets a cone put around his head by a veterinarian. This cone does its job and protects his zit from popping. However, on the day of the drawing, Jude doesn't win; instead, the winner is a guy named Shay Walker. To make matters worse, when Shay raises his arms in celebration, they bang into Jude's cone and slam it against the zit, popping it.
Sub-Plot Two: Identity Theft
After Caitlin discovers that her card is missing, her first act is to call her credit card company and find out where it was last used. When she learns that it was used that same day at a store where she would never shop, Caitlin concludes that her card has been stolen. Before Caitlin can cancel the card, though, Jen intervenes, because she thinks that they can solve the case themselves and capture the crook.
While Caitlin isn't certain about the efficacy of this idea, she knows that it will help keep Jen's mind off of Travis, and she agrees to let Jen try and solve the case. Soon, the dynamic duo set off and go from store to store, trying to track down the perpetrator. After much searching, they close in on the thief in the food court, and while Caitlin is initially willing to let him off when she sees how cute he is, her mind soon changes when Jen reminds her of how the man stole from her, and she has Ron take him away to hold until the cops show up.
- Nikki: Are you really gonna make one of us ask?
Jonesy: I got a new job at the photocopy shop. It's called Copy Bats.
Jen: Shouldn't that be Copy Cats?
Jonesy: That's what I said to the boss. He said that name was already taken.
- Wyatt: Why am I single? (repeatedly smacking his head on the table) Why? Why? Why?
- Nikki: What's that?
Jonesy: It's my list. (Jude and Wyatt gasp.)
Jen: The list?
Jude: I've never been so close. (He approaches the list but is stopped by Jonesy.)
Jonesy: A meticulous record of every girl I've ever encountered. Notes, phone numbers, assessments, play by plays, it's all in here.
Nikki: Uh, no. Hang on a second!
Jonesy: If this can help you get back in the game and avoid being eaten by cats, I want you to take it.
Nikki: (snatching the list) I cannot believe that A) you have a list, and B) you've been carrying it around with you the whole time we've been dating!
- Nikki: How long have we been dating?
Jonesy: For like, a while?
Nikki: A while? No no no. In months, Jonesy. How many months have we been together. (to Jen) No helping! (to Jonesy) Well, how many months?
Nikki: Give me a number!
Jonesy: Oh Nikki! What's a number anyway?
Wyatt: A mathematical representation of value.
Jonesy: And that is why you're single.
Nikki: You know what? You should hang on to your list! Who knows when you might need it again?
- Nikki: Am I on the list? (Jonesy tries to stop her but fails.) "Nikki: no skirts; smells good unless nervous; with all those piercings, it's like kissing a tackle box?!?"
Jonesy: The list is out of date! That's from before we were really a couple!
Nikki: So what would you say if you wrote it now, huh? How would you sum me up?
Jonesy: Um, Nikki is...uh...good?
Nikki: That's how you feel about me? I'm, "uh, good?" That's it?
Jonesy: I, uh, I don't know how I feel!
Nikki: Talking stops now!
Jonesy: Nikki wait!
- Jonesy: You deserve to have this.
Wayne: Thank you, Jonesy. Thank you. (He opens up the paper.)
Jonesy: It's a photocopy of my bum.
Wayne: For the last time, give me. That. List!
Jonesy: You'll never get your hands on it!
Wayne: We'll see about that! (He stops to stare at Jonesy's buttocks until Jonesy snatches the picture back.)
- Caitlin: My credit card is gone!
Jen: Where'd you use it last?
Caitlin: I don't know. I'll call and find out. (on the phone) Hi, this is Caitlin Cooke. Can you tell me the last place I used my credit card? Today? Bargain Fashion Hut? But their smallest size is an eight! (She hangs up.) Someone stole my credit card!
- Wyatt: Careful. That zit gets much bigger, any little thing could pop it.
Jude: Dude, you think? I gotta protect the luckster at all costs!
- (A crowd runs toward Jonesy.)
Jonesy: (running off) Gotta go!
Jude: (running off) Don't hurt my zit!
Nikki: I'm so mad at him right now! I wish I could just smash that stupid PDA! Hey, do you know where it is?
Wyatt: Jude said he was going to hide it in the air vents.
Nikki: Air vents. Got it!
Wyatt: But now he's going to put it somewhere else!
- Nikki: When I find his PDA, I'm gonna crush it in my hand! Is that a mousetrap? What's that doing up here? Oh no! Mice!
- Jen: Caitlin, this guy stole from you. He went on a shopping spree that should've been yours, and now he wants you to pay for it!
Caitlin: You're right! Book him, Ron! Sorry, hotstuff. Maybe there's something between us and maybe there isn't, but I'm still sending you over. If you can't do the time, you don't do the crime.
Jen: This was so much fun!
- Wayne: This isn't over! We'll never stop until we get that list!"
Jonesy: I could never let that happen, Wayne, so you leave me no choice! (He throws the list into the fountain.)
Wayne: No! Why would you do that?!? (He begins crying.)
- Wyatt: (reading Nikki's profile on the list) "Nikki: She's the one." Whoa!
Nikki: So, I feel the same way.
- Jonesy's Job: employee at Copy Bats
Reason for firing: Unknown.
- Similarly to Coach Halder, Nikki may have musophobia, a fear of mice.
- The online game Zit Defence, which was made available on the Teletoon website, was based on this episode.
- Shay Walker, the longboard contest winner, looks exactly like Norm, the manager of the Galleria Mall arcade who only appeared in the episode "Jonesy's Low Mojo."
- Wyatt mentions driving his date home. This could imply that sometime between the events of this episode and "A Ding from Down Under", Wyatt may have gotten his driver's license.
- Jude enters a contest hosted by Grind Me, much like how he did in the episode "Smarten Up". Incidentally, the prize was a year of free coffee, which was what Jude already won in a different contest.
- Caitlin refers Jude's chin zit as a "lip thingy on his chin." This references the episode "The One with the Cold Sore", where she addressed her cold sore as a "lip thingy." (Jude, in turn, called it a "lip zit.")
- Caitlin mentions the "Von Ditch" store, which was first mentioned in the episode "Losing Your Lemon."
- Jude mentions that the longboard was autographed by Christian Lotenza. The name is a play on Christian Potenza, Jude's voice actor.
- Wayne references the 1975 film Escape to Witch Mountain when quoting "like the kids who escaped Warlock Mountain, I possess extrasensory perception".
- Parts of the main plot are a reference to the 1954 novel The Lord of the Rings. These being:
- Several forces are competing for possession of the PDA, similarly to how the forces are fighting over a ring.
- The protagonists of both 6teen and Lord of the Rings play "Keep away" from their opponents.
- The PDA is thrown into a mall fountain, causing it to stop working. In The Lord of the Rings, the ring is thrown into a volcano.
- One of Wayne's lines, "One list to rule them all," is directly lifted from the line "One ring to rule them all."
- Wayne's statement "The horror. The horror." is a reference to the novel Heart of Darkness, where those are the final words of Colonel Kurtz.
- Alternatively, and considering Wayne's fascination with film, the statement could be a reference to Apocalypse Now, which was loosely based on the novel in question.
Wayne trying to persuade Wyatt.
Nikki hunting down the list.
Caitlin and Jen in disguises.
Caitlin and Jen catch the thief.
Shay Walker next to Jude.
This clip was provided by JDD6214 on YouTube.