How the Rent-A-Cop Stole Christmas is the 66th episode of 6teen and the 14th episode of the third season. It aired on Teletoon in Canada on December 20, 2007, and remains unaired in the United States.
Another Christmas comes to the mall. This year, though, Ron is in a bad mood and is trying to wreck Christmas. Jen is collecting toys for charity, but is having a hard time not opening all of them to find out what's inside. Nikki's mom is working at a gift-wrapping table alongside Nikki's coworkers, and her presence is driving Nikki crazy–not to mention worrying Jonesy, who fears that Mrs. Wong may discover all the ways in which he's a parent's nightmare. And Jude is just hoping that somehow he can get a toy he missed out on eleven years ago.
Jen, Wyatt, and Caitlin are all guarding a huge pile of Christmas presents that have been collected for charity when a little girl comes up and donates one to Jen. Jen wants to know what it is; when the little girl reveals that she doesn't know, Jen accepts and puts the present on the pile. She then confides to Wyatt that being around all these presents and not knowing what's in them is torture for her; before they can talk too much about it, though, Nikki arrives and remarks on Caitlin's reindeer costume. Caitlin is quite proud of it, but her pride is mitigated by envy–envy of Jonesy, who got the job of being in the snowman costume. The four teens then look over towards Jonesy and see him partying and having a good time even though he's wearing a fifty-pound costume.
Soon, though, Ron arrives at the pile of charitable donations in a bad mood and looking to arrest somebody. He finds no infractions and soon storms off, but not before warning the teens that he'll be watching them. As soon as he's gone, the conversation turns back to the teens plans, as Wyatt invites Nikki to help them collect presents. Nikki can't do this, however, as she has to wrap presents with the Clones. As she says this, she turns to look at the wrapping table and sees a horrific sight: her mother is at the table, is helping to wrap, and has started to bond with her coworkers. This new turn of events annoys Nikki, and she heads off to get a coffee to try and clear her head.
Nikki isn't the only one worried about Mrs. Wong, however. Jonesy is also worried about her presence because, as he confides to Wyatt, he has a face he shows to parents that is polite and considerate and overall a joy to behold that he never uses at the mall. He's worried that he'll end up screwing up in front of Nikki's mom and that she'll refuse to let them date any more. Jonesy decides to do his best, though, and he soon heads out to see Mrs. Wong to try and charm her. He screws up several times in his attempt, however, as he keeps letting slip that he's not as wonderful as he'd like to appear–he acknowledges that he's throwing a party, mentions stealing Ron's golf cart, and on top of that Jude lets slip that Jonesy is flunking art class. Before he can dig himself too deep, though, Ron arrives. The angry mall security officer insults the wrapping job the table is doing and then confiscates the most popular wrapping paper before leaving. When Darth then shows up with an odd gift for his girlfriend, Jonesy decides to just cut his losses and leave. Unfortunately, the conversation between Jonesy and Nikki's mom has left Mrs. Wong's suspicions raised, and she is no longer as happy with Jonesy as she once was.
Ron, meanwhile, is still going nuts on Christmas, ripping down wreaths and even yelling at the mall Santa Claus. When the confused Santa tries to protest, as he's just doing his job, Ron refuses to hear it, and drags Santa off to mall jail. One thing that everybody can agree on is that Ron is going way over-the-top with his hatred of Christmas; before they can focus on this too much, though, Jonesy brings up that he's having problems. Caitlin has a solution for him, however: buy Nikki a thoughtful present. This reminds Jonesy that he forgot to do this, but before he can leave in order to get Nikki's present, Big Steve arrives and tells Jonesy to get back to work. Jonesy is now caught between a rock and a hard place: he needs to get his girlfriend a present, but he can't afford to lose his job. Caitlin's all too willing to take over, however, and soon Caitlin is suited up in the snowman costume and Jonesy is heading out to buy Nikki's present.
While Jonesy heads off to get the present, Caitlin finds that she's blind and unbalanced in the costume. She wobbles around, and when a young boy demands a piggyback ride by leaping on her back, she stumbles forward. Caitlin does manage to save herself by grabbing on to a bystander; unfortunately, the bystander is a woman, and Caitlin has grabbed onto her breasts for support. To make matters worse, this has all occurred within the line of sight of Mrs. Wong and the Clones.
Meanwhile, Ron is going even more over-the-top, as he cuts down a gigantic Christmas tree that Albatross & Finch has set up and then hands a ticket to the employees for violating a rule against live trees in the mall. While he does this, Mrs. Wong tries to set Nikki up with a Greeter God named Merrick. Nikki is resistant until her mother tells her why she now dislikes Jonesy. Upon hearing what Jonesy has done, Nikki stomps off to confront him. There, she finds out that he didn't grope anybody, but warns him that he's on thin ice with her mother and should therefore be on his best behavior.
Jonesy does his best not to mess up, and he thinks he's got it all figured out when he buys his girlfriend a travel atlas. He delivers it to the wrapping table with a note. Unfortunately, the table gets jostled, and his note falls onto a different gift entirely. When Nikki and her mother discover the gift, Nikki calls her boyfriend to the table and reams him out for getting her candy underwear. Jonesy tries to explain the situation, but before he can he is interrupted by Caitlin, who has found the toy that Jude wants. The rest of the group then arrives with a mountain of unwrapped toys just as Ron shows up.
Ron's reaction to the chaos is to take the teenagers and throw them into mall jail with Santa Claus. At first, the teenagers are angry at Ron for ruining Christmas, but their anger soon turns to confusion when they start to notice odd things about the Mall Security headquarters. Ron's office is decorated with all kinds of confiscated Christmas paraphernalia, there are Christmas carols playing, and Ron is wearing a Christmas sweater and offering his prisoners cookies and eggnog. Ron then mentions he has turkey dinners in the microwave and walks off to get them while the captured teens discuss how poorly Christmas is going. Jude is perhaps the most despondent, as he was once again unable to get his fire truck; upon hearing this, his friends decide not to make him wait, and hand over the fire truck. Jude is excited by the gift, but soon Ron butts in with a story.
Apparently, when Ron was a child, he got the same fire truck for Christmas just before his father headed off to war. The truck was his favorite toy, and he played with it every day until one day he lost control of it and it rolled down to the docks and off of a pier, where it was swallowed by a great white shark. To this day, he remembers it as the darkest day of his life.
Upon hearing this, Jude decides that Ron could do more with the toy than he could, and he hands it over to Ron. Ron is amazed by Jude's selflessness, and he sets the group free. The teens are about to leave when they stop because Wyatt has just had a moment of clarity: Ron doesn't hate Christmas. Ron is just lonely and doesn't have anybody to spend Christmas with, so he spent his time confiscating stuff and jailing people in order to have somebody to spend Christmas Eve with.
The teens decide that Ron deserves to have a good Christmas Eve, so they invite him to the mall's Christmas party. When they arrive, they find all the donated presents wrapped. The wrappers were none other than Mrs. Wong and the Clones, who while wrapping the presents found Jonesy's actual gift to Nikki. Nikki is amazed by the quality of Jonesy's gift, and they kiss while Santa declares that today is indeed a Merry Christmas.
Sub-Plot One: Jen's Obsession
After Nikki takes off to work with her mother and coworkers, the presents start to pile up at the donation center, and Jen becomes more and more stressed about not knowing what they are. She starts shaking boxes to try and find out what's inside, and eventually the strain gets too much: she opens a box to see if she guessed right. After this, it's a slow slide down, as she opens three more presents, including one that turns out to be a fire engine that Jude desires. She refuses to let Jude take it, but on her suggestion Jude deserts the table in order to buy one himself.
Wyatt is then called away by Jonesy, who wants him to witness Ron cutting down the tree. However, when Jen is left alone with all the presents, she can't help herself, and she ends up unwrapping every single donated present. With no recourse left, she, Jude, and Wyatt decide to drag the presents to be rewrapped by the Khaki Barn staff, but they get arrested for being suspicious by Ron. When they're let out of jail, it seems that nothing short of a Christmas miracle will save them–but one arrives in the form of Nikki's mother, who wrapped all of the presents with help from the Clones.
Sub-Plot Two: Red Johnson Fire Engine
The present that Jude sees Jen open is an Official Red Johnson Fire Engine. When he was five, one was on top of his Hanukkah wish list, but his parents couldn't get one so he instead got a bunny sweater. Jen refuses to hand over the engine, but suggests that he buy one himself. Jude, who has the money and the ability to buy one, decides to do just that, but no matter where he looks, they're all sold out. When he gets thrown in jail along with his friends, he's depressed because he thinks he'll never find one–until Caitlin reveals that she found and bought one for him. Jude is cheered up by this, but when he hears Ron's memory of having the exact same fire truck, he decides to give it away to the rent-a-cop as a Christmas present.
Nikki: You dressed up. Voluntarily. For the holidays. You're such a Christmas nerd. Caitlin: I love the holidays! And I love dressing up.
Wyatt: Amazing. Even in a fifty-pound snowman costume, Jonesy is still Jonesy.
Jonesy: This is not good, dude. Nikki said her mom's gonna be in the mall all day. Wyatt: So? Nikki's mom loves you. Jonesy: Nikki's mom loves Parental Jonesy. There's a big difference between him and Regular Jonesy. Parental Jonesy is polite, considerate, has actual–I don't know, goals? Basically, he's delightful! Wyatt: And Regular Jonesy? Jonesy: Isn't! C'mon, dude, I'm not exactly a parent's dream! I love to party, I get bad grades, I get fired. Wyatt: What about goals? You have goals. Jonesy: The biggest goal I have right now is to throw a killer New Year's Eve party and not get caught.
Nikki: Hey, Yoda. What's that? Darth: It's a Queen Amidala costume for Julie. We like to roleplay.
Kristen: I've never seen someone blow it that well in front of a parent before!
Nikki: Mom, I have a boyfriend. Jonesy, remember? Mrs. Wong: You can do better than him.
Nikki: You bought me candy underwear? Jonesy: Yep. (realizes) No! Nikki: And you were going to have my mom wrap it? Are you completely insane?
Jonesy's job: Wearing a snowman costume and spreading holiday cheer Reason for firing: While in the costume, Caitlin tripped and accidentally groped a woman's breasts. Big Steve, who was sponsoring the snowman, heard about this and fired Jonesy, thinking that Jonesy was inside the suit.
This episode reveals Jude is Jewish.
Elements of this episode are very reminiscent of a couple of plots on Seinfeld.
Caitlin trips and accidentally touches a woman's breasts while in costume, similar to what Elaine Benes did in "The Implant."
Jonesy's tirade about "Parental Jonesy" sounds a lot like (and parodies) George Costanza's "Relationship George" rant from "The Pool Guy."
In this episode, Caitlin dresses up for Christmas voluntarily. However, in "In a Retail Wonderland..." she was mortified when she saw her boyfriend wearing a costume for his Christmas job. Of course, the big difference is probably due to the fact that Connor's outfit was gaudy, tasteless, and ugly.
Marilyn makes a cameo at the beginning of this episode when he donates a gift.
Jonesy mentions a time when he and some friends stole Ron's golf cart. In all likelihood, he is referencing "The New Guy," where the theft was the start of a massive prank that made Ron quit his job.
Darth reveals in this episode that he and Julie like to roleplay with Star Wars, and to this end, he has gotten her a Queen Amidala costume for Christmas.
Gwen makes a cameo as a customer at the gift-wrapping station.